


Untitled (title pending)

by JustBeStill



Category: Invader Zim, Rick and Morty, Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: Rise of Empire Era - All Media Types
Genre: Brutal Murder, Darkfic, Decapitation, Killing, Sith!Zim, Use of the Force, Zim is excited to meet another version of himself, crossover fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-08
Updated: 2020-08-13
Packaged: 2021-03-04 20:07:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25142116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JustBeStill/pseuds/JustBeStill
Summary: Rick and Morty run into a curious alien named Zim, and his dangerous counterpart.
Comments: 1
Kudos: 4





	1. Chapter 1

Zim was sitting in a bar, drinking from a bottle of alcohol, while Dib sat close to him not far off, resting in a chair at one of the tables nearby, eating some nachos and talking with Skoodge about space travel.

“Hey!” Zim yelled at them, “Shut up over there, I’m trying to forget my problems!”

Dib shot him a glare. “You shut up, asshole! Are you done yet, by the way? We’ve been here a while.”

“Well, YOU can just eat shit, Dib!” Zim spat at him. “You and you’re fucking… glasses… and you’re big…HEAD!”

He tried to climb down from the barstool, but fell flat on his face when he tripped over the rug on the floor.

Dib laughed. “Ha! That’s karma for you!”

“I’ll KILL karma!” Zim snarled, getting back to his feet. “And I’ll make you watch!”

Dib shot Skoodge a confused look. “That doesn’t make any sense, Zim.”

“Yeah, well…” Zim sputtered. “Y-You’re… FACE doesn’t make any sense, but I still have to look at it every five seconds!”

Suddenly, a portal opened in the middle of the bar, and two humans stepped out, arguing about being a pickle.

Zim stared at them with a shocked expression, his bottle slipping from his hand and shattering on the floor. “What the HELL is-“

The two humans, one older and the other much younger, were still arguing. 

“I’m telling you, Morty,” the older one was saying, “you weren’t there, you didn’t see how FUCKING AWESOME I was! I tore those rats to PIECES!”

Zim stared in shock, rooted to the spot, as the two strangers approached him. 

“Greetings, salutations, whatever the hell your form of greeting is,” the taller one muttered to him. “My name is Rick, from Dimension C-137, and this is my grandson, Morty,” he gestured to the smaller human beside him. 

The human called Rick pulled out a data pad and showed him a picture. “We’re searching for this gem. Its supposed to power something I’m working on, but don’t ask what it is because I’m not telling you.” Rick cleared his throat. “Anyway, have you seen it around here?”

Zim finally recovered from his shock. “I have not understood a SINGLE sentence you have uttered from that filthy hole you call a mouth!” 

The younger one, Morty, chuckled. “Dang, you got burned, Rick!”

“Shut up, Morty!” Rick snapped at the child. “I’m trying to question this…” he turned back to Zim. “What the hell ARE you, anyway?”

Zim scowled. “Surely you have heard of an Irken before? We’ve conquered thousands of galaxies!”

Rick put a hand on his chin. “Hmm… nope! Never heard of you before! Are all Irkens as short as you?”

Zim drew his blaster. “That’s it, you need to leave! Right now!”

Rick laughed. “Look, Morty, this little shrimp thinks he can win against us! How funny is that?”

Morty laughed. “Haha, yeah, t-t-that’s pretty funny, Rick!”

Zim glanced behind the two humans and noticed that the portal they came though was still open. “Go back to where you came, wretched stink beasts! Zim has business to conduct here!”

The humans only laughed harder at that, falling onto the ground and rolling on the floor. 

“Wretched stink beasts, that’s a new one!” Rick said, wiping at his eyes. “I’ll add that to the list of insults!”

Now Zim was angry. He picked up an empty bottle of beer from his spot and gripped it by the neck and threw it at the old man as he tried to stand back up, hitting him in the face.

He flew back and hit the ground again, his face dripping with spilled alcohol. He looked up at Zim in shock. “WHY YOU LITTLE-!”

“RICK! A-A-ARE YOU OKAY?!” Morty said in surprise, also shocked.

Rick stood up and brushed himself off. “Yeah, I’m fine, Morty, don’t pee yourself over it.”

Zim was on them in a second, blaster out and aimed in their direction. “Get! Out!”

Morty tried to take a swing at Zim, but the Irken dodged the attack and hit him in the face with the But of his blaster, knocking him back to the ground.

“Right now? Here?” Zim looked around, then shrugged. “Okay, that’s fine with me,”

He raised his blaster and fired at Rick, but the older human was prepared for that. He pressed a button on his wrist gauntlet, and a protective bubble surrounded him, shielding him from Zim’s attacks.

“Nice try, bug, but I’m the smartest person in the galaxy!” Rick boasted. “You can’t kill ME!”

“I will try,” Zim said, and raised himself onto his PAK legs. “You DARE challenge a member of the Irken race?!”

Rick gestured. “Yeah, come on, I’m ready for you! I’ve got all day!”

Zim fired his PAK lasers, and Rick ducked, as the beam scorched the walls behind him.

“Shit, I wasn’t expecting that!” Rick said in surprise, staring at the ruined wall. “Okay, we’ve gotten ourselves in a bit of a pickle!”

He grabbed Morty’s arm and fired at the wall with his gun, and another green portal appeared. “Come on, Morty, we’ve seen enough here!”

“Wait, Rick!” The smaller human said. “W-We still don’t know if the gem is here! Anyone here c-c-could have it!”

“Well, its obviously not here, or we would have found it. Now, come on, we have to keep searching!”

They started to leave, when another alien entered though the portal.

Rick groaned. “Shit, what does this thing want?”

The newest stranger, a masked alien similar to the one they had just been fighting, stared up at them curiously, then brushed past them and approached the counter where Zim stood.

Rick watched, distracted, as the newcomer sat down and pulled out a strange form of currency.  
Both portals closed with a soft hum, but the human hardly noticed it. He let go of his grandson’s arm, strangely drawn to this particular creature. The air felt heavy and thick now, like some sort of powerful presence was now in the room with them.

Even from across the room, Rick heard the creature speak, the voice sounding as if it was filled with static and slightly distorted. 

“I would like to buy a drink from you,” it addressed the bartender, sliding the currency over to him. “This should cover it.”

The bartender slid the strange metal over to himself, staring at it, then returned it to its owner. “Sorry, sir, we don’t take this form of currency. If you have any Shilks or Schmooks, we will happily accept those!”

The masked creature was quiet, staring at the server. “What.” 

The bartender shrugged, “Sorry, pal, no Schmooks, no service.”

“It is all that I have,” the alien said in a confused tone. “Is this planet not controlled by the Empire?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about, friend,” the bartender said. “This is neutral space, we’re in the Terraneous system, on the planet Farbellion-7.”

“Terraneous system?” The creature asked, shaking his head. “That cannot be accurate, my navigation device says that my destination should be Malachor. I have heard no mention of my Master changing my route.”

“Well, that’s not where you’re at, buddy, sorry to tell you,” the bartender said in a disinterested tone, already starting to focus on the next customer.

Rick strode over to the creature, intending to question him of the whereabouts of the crystal gem they were searching for. He sat down next to it. “Boy, I’ve had a tough day. What’s wrong with you?”

The masked alien turned his head to regard him for a second, then ignored him. Rick could hear the breathing respirator that covered his face, faintly hissing with fresh oxygen. 

“That bad, huh?” The scientist said, chuckling. “Yeah, I understand. Say, I’ve got a question for you,” he pulled out the data pad again and set it on the counter. “Have you seen this crystal anywhere? We kind of need it.”

The creature pulled it close to him with one hand, looking at the picture closely. He handed it back. “I will be no help to you, I’m afraid. I have never come into contact with this object.”

“Oh, uh, okay,” Rick said nervously, taking back the data pad. The air around him was so heavy that he felt like he was surrounded by a thick, invisible fog. “Thank you for your time, mr..?”

“You may refer to me as Zim if you wish,” the creature said quietly, watching the bartender rather curiously.

At this, the other Irken turned his head towards them. “Wait, what did you say you’re name was?”

The creature turned to address him. “I am called Zim, but you may also call me Ceren if you prefer,”

“Holy Irk, that’s my name!” Zim said excitedly, immediately climbing into the other empty seat opposite the creature. “Tell me about you!”

“I am not sure I understand,” ‘Ceren’ said. “There is nothing to tell.”

Zim smirked, eyes shining with excitement. “You’re me, aren’t you? Then you have SO MUCH to tell!”

The other Zim paused. “I am…you…” he said slowly. “And you… are me.”

“Yes, we covered that already!” Zim said. He reached for the mask. “That’s a cool mask! Can I see it?”

Ceren grabbed his hand. “It cannot be removed,” he said. “The mask stays.”

Zim sulked. “Okay, FINE!” He returned to his drinks. “But you at least have to tell me how you got it! Its so cool!”

“Another time, perhaps,” Ceren waved it away. He glanced around. “Is my Master nearby?”

Zim offered a look of confusion. “Who is your Master? Is he as amazing as you, because if so I would absolutely love to meet them!” 

Ceren climbed off the barstool and went to the middle of the room, standing amidst the other patrons. He reached up to the side of his mask and seem to turn some kind of dial, then spoke, his voice somehow amplified and clear:

“Na-hah ur su ka-haat. Su ka haru aat.”

He waited a few moments, the other patrons staring at him strangely, then he moved back to his seat at the bar. “He is not here,” Ceren said, staring down at the counter. “And I cannot feel him through the Force. He must be worried by now.”

Rick, who had watched the display with morbid fascination, scoffed. “I bet he’s probably dead.”

Ceren turned to him. “Dead?”

“Well, yeah, probably,” Rick said dismissively, waving over the bartender to order a drink for himself, “This planet is dangerous, but they have the BEST drinks! Tell him, Morty!”

Morty, who had been silently watching the events unfolding, shrugged. “They’re okay.”

“What do you mean ‘okay?’” Rick challenged. “They’re clearly the best the galaxy has ever had!”

“I don’t know, okay?!” Morty yelled out. “I’ve never had them before!”

Rick scoffed and turned away. “Fucking dumbass. YOU’RE DUMB, MORTY, YOU LITTLE BITCH!”

“FUCK YOU, RICK!” Morty shouted back, flipping him the bird.

“No, FUCK YOU!” Rick argued back. “You little shit!”

Ceren ignored the exchange. He gestured for the bartender again. 

“You know your money is no good here, right?” Zim said, still sitting next to him. He pulled out a small pouch and reached inside of it. “Let me help you out.”

He pulled out a few coins and put them on the table. At Ceren’s questioning look, he held up the bag. “I have a few kinds of currency in here. Mostly just coins and credits, though.”

“Do you have Republic credits, as well?” Ceren asked, staring at the small pouch. “Is Imperial currency not transferable on this planet?”

“What?” Zim asked, confused. “Uh… I don’t think so? I don’t really understand. Where do they have those?”

Ceren gave him a long, lingering stare, then shook his head and turned away. “When am I allowed to acquire a drink?”

“Oh, I can take care of that,” Zim smirked as the bartender came over.

“What will it be, sir?” 

“One Fox Mulder for me, and for my friend here…” he stopped. “What would you like to drink?”

“Corellian whiskey, if you have it,” Ceren said, sliding some of Zim’s money toward the bartender.

“Say again?” The bartender asked, leaning forward a little. 

Ceren repeated his order.

“What kind of drugs is this guy on?” The bartender asked rhetorically, addressing Zim this time. 

Quick as a cheetah, Ceren stood up on his stool and jumped on top of the counter, lifting his hand. The bartender started choking, and was lifted into the air. 

“I will ask once more,” Ceren said, hissing through the static in his mask, “give me a drink-“ he reached down toward his belt at the metal stick thing hanging there, and pressed a button. A laser beam sprang to life, blood red and humming dangerously. He angled it towards the alien’s throat. “-or you will DIE!”

“Annnd we are OUTTA HERE!” Rick said immediately, grabbing Morty’s arm. “Come on, Morty, this time we’re leaving for real!”

“What about the gem?” Morty asked.

“Forget the gem, we’re leaving!” Rick hissed at his grandson, starting to pull him along.

Before he could pull out his portal gun, Rick found himself unable to move at all. He looked down and saw that Morty was in the same predicament he was.

“You…” a static-filled voice said. “…are staying with us until I am able to depart this wretched place!” 

Then all hell broke loose.

Someone fired a weapon at Ceren, but the little Sith sensed the attack and deflected the shot back at his attacker with ease, killing them.

Then he slashed the bartender across the chest, killing them instantly.

Ceren jumped down from the counter and chuckled, the sound strange yet frightening. “You have all doomed yourselves!” He raised his free hand as a burst of lightning erupted from it, frying the aliens closest to him. 

The hum of his weapon, crackling with unstable power, rang in the air, loud and clear, as Ceren slashed at attacking patrons as they attempted to subdue the creature.

Zim immediately dived into a corner, using his PAK legs to create a shield to hide behind.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zim and his alternate self fight Rick and Morty.

While his counterpart was busy slaughtering the patrons in the bar, Zim watched from his hiding spot in the corner. He would gladly join, but the air was so thick with something powerful, and he knew it was better to just let this otherworldly creature do what it wanted. 

The glowing sword in his hand spun and hissed with clear deadly power, cutting down attacking aliens. Some tried o escape, but Ceren quickly made a gesture with his free hand towards the doors, and they slammed shut as if they had a mind of their own.

Zim looked over towards the humans, Rick and Morty, seeing that they were also seeking cover behind the counter where the drinks were served. The younger one was saying something to the older one, and pointing towards their white lab coat and reaching for the glowing gun again.

It was fired at the wall again, and a portal opened up, just as it had done previously. The two humans started to run towards the swirling hole, just as Ceren struck down the last patron.

Zim saw Ceren turn towards the humans and raise his arm. Brightness filled the bar as a beautiful surge of crackling energy erupted from his hand, arching towards the fleeing survivors. The attack nearly was successful, but the humans flung themselves into the portal with a fearful yell, disappearing into the wall.

Ceren ran after them, gesturing towards Zim and yanking his hand back. 

Zim was suddenly yanked towards Ceren by an invisible force, and the masked Irken made another gesture, flinging his arm towards the portal. 

Zim flew into the swirling vortex with a surprised scream, and Ceren jumped in after him as the portal closed.

Zim hit the ground with a painful thump, rolling around for a few seconds and and then coming to a stop. He stood up as Ceren appeared behind him running out of the portal without stopping.

The ones called Rick and Morty were still fleeing, opening up another portal with their strange-looking gun. 

Still pursuing the two, Ceren raised his arm again and curled his hand slowly into a fist, and the young human boy suddenly stopped running, clutching at his throat and collapsing to the ground. The older human stopped and looked back, face wearing a shocked expression as he stared down at the gasping child.

Zim stood there, unsure of what to do. 

Appearing to know what he was feeling, his alternate other looked back at him. “With me!” Ceren instructed, pointing towards the humans.

Zim nodded and followed suit, running towards their targets. As he ran past his other, Ceren activated his glowing sword and threw it towards the one named Rick, the weapon spinning in the air as it neared its intended target.

Rick quickly ducked, and the sword missed, flying over his head and embedding itself into a nearby rock.

“Do not let them get away!” Ceren yelled back at Zim, his voice crackling and distorted, sending a chill down Zim’s spine. “Disarm the tall one!”

The glowing sword flew out of the rock and back into its owner’s hand, just as a giant slug started to crawl towards them, blocking their path. With a swing of his weapon, Ceren cut a line down the slug’s body, and guts and blood spilled out in rivers.

Ceren carved a hole straight though the giant worm, and Zim saw that Morty was coughing, kneeled over on the ground. Rick saw the two Irkens approaching them and quickly grabbed Morty by the hand, forcefully pulling him to his feet. 

The older man aimed his wrist watch at the pair and a beam of energy shot towards them. Ceren easily deflected the shot into the ground, his sword crackling dangerously. His breathing was quick and fast, though deep and focused. The tubes connected to the machine on his back hissed loudly with each breath the alien took.

Zim fired back at their prey, but Rick dodged and pressed a button on his watch, a bright green bubble emerging and encasing himself and the child in a protective shield that absorbed all of Zim’s shots.

“Enough of this,” Ceren said from beside his counterpart, “They die now!” 

He made another pulling gesture, and the wristwatch that Rick was wearing flew off of his body, the shield around them flickering and fading away, leaving them exposed and now unprotected.

Ceren caught the watch in his hand and crushed it, dropping the remains into the dirt. He stepped on it for good measure, grounding the pieces further into the ground.

He stared back at their prey, the humans, looking unsure of what to do now. Morty made the first move, running towards the waiting portal. 

:”Not this time,” Ceren rasped, quickly deactivating his light sword and raising both hands, unleashing another surge of bright blue energy.

The deadly electricity reached the younger child, enveloping him in pure deadly energy. Morty screamed as he fell back to the ground, writhing in agony.

“MORTY!” Rick yelled, trying to run towards his grandson. His attempt was immediately squandered, however. He started squeezing his own throat as his attacker made another fist. Ceren cackled, the laugh sounding purely gleeful and sadistic.

Zim watched this display of chaos, blaster still out but lowered. The former Elite was fascinated by this being’s pure power, and he wondered where exactly he came from, and what place or energy source allowed him to wield such power.

The young boy was still screaming in agony, energy continuing to surround and shock him. 

“Kill him!” Ceren said to Zim, his voice angry and determined. He nodded towards Rick. “KILL HIM! DO IT NOW!”

Zim raised his blaster, aiming it towards the helpless man.

But then he hesitated. He was still for another moment, then lowered his blaster. “I can’t. He’s unarmed. It wouldn’t be fair.”

Ceren stopped shocking Morty, once Zim’s words reached his antennae. His hand became a fist, and Zim felt the air around him grow thick and suffocating again. “What did you say?” His counterpart growled, the distorted voice filled with barely concealed rage.

Zim swallowed nervously, knowing this being could easily kill him before he would even have time to react. “I... I can’t kill him. Maybe we could use him for our cause?”

Ceren still would not face him. “They are our enemy,” he said slowly, “and they must be seen as a threat to us.”

Zim nodded, unable to speak now. The air around him was just too thick, dangerous vibes crawling up his back. 

Ceren waited a few seconds, then lost all patience. He snarled, switching on his laser sword. With an enraged shout, he threw it towards Rick, the blade spinning rapidly through the air. Morty screamed as he witnessed his grandfather be decapitated, the lifeless body falling to the ground in a pile of rapidly spreading blood.

Morty grabbed the portal gun from Rick’s lab coat and fired it at at the ground, and Ceren pulled the gun from his grasp just as Morty jumped through the newly opened portal.

Once the portal closed, Ceren stood there, unmoving, holding the gun in his hand. He picked up his laser sword and switched it on again, breathing erratically. 

Zim started to approach him slowly. “Are you-“

Suddenly Ceren turned and thrust out his hand, and Zim was shoved back by an invisible force, slamming into a large rock embedded into the dirt behind them.

Zim groaned and sat up, rubbing his head. That had really hurt.

His counterpart walked up to him, his sword humming loudly. He grabbed Zim by the throat, pressing with almost crushing force. His laser sword was slowly moving towards Zim’s face, stopping just an inch away from his eye.

“The next time I tell you to kill someone, you will do it,” Ceren hissed angrily, squeezing harder on Zim’s throat, “if you hesitate like that again, they will be the least of your worries. Am I understood?”

Gasping, Zim nodded, staring into the mask of his counterpart. He noticed that it was secured to his face with clasps, and quite possibly COULD be removed if the wearer desired it to be. He stored that information away for later.

He was released, and he dropped to the ground, coughing and rubbing his throat to make the burning go away quicker.

“There is no need for mercy,” Ceren said, standing over him. “Mercy is a delusion for the weak to think they are strong.” He deactivated his sword and clipped it back onto his belt, extending a hand towards Zim. “Join me, and you shall have everything you could possibly desire.”

Zim stared up at this absolute monster, now doubtful that this thing could possibly be himself from another dimension. He was now unsure if he wanted to remain with him any longer, but then he thought back to its prior displays of raw, unbridled rage, and then he took a deep breath and took the hand that was offered to him.

“Excellent,” Ceren said as he pulled Zim to his feet, “Your skills will be very useful to us.”

“Us?” Zim wondered aloud, coughing once as the pain in his throat slowly faded away.

“Referring to my Master and myself,” Ceren clarified patiently, “I am sure that he would find you very useful, as I have.”

“Who’s your Master?” Zim questioned curiously.

Ceren ignored his question and held up the portal gun, inspecting its design. He tapped the small area containing the gun’s charge. “A fine piece of machinery,” he mused, “Very impressive craftsmanship.” 

He stowed the gun away in his robes and gestured towards Rick’s lifeless body. “See if there is anything else he was carrying that may help us find the boy.”

Zim did as he was ordered, slowly removing the lab coat from the body, careful not to get any of the blood on himself. He checked the various pockets lining the fabric of the clothing, pulling out a few more small discs and a small, half-empty flask filled with alcohol.

“These are all I could find,” Zim said after he had finished his search, holding out his findings towards his counterpart.

Ceren lifted his hand towards the discs, and they flew into his hand with ease. He pocketed them as well. “Are you sure there is nothing else?”

“Positive,” Zim said, looking him in the eyes. Or, where his eyes would be if the mask wasn’t covering his face.

Ceren sighed thoughtfully, then extended his hand and retrieved the lab coat with his powers again, sifting though the pockets silently. “You appear to be correct in your assessment,” he said, “but one thing you should know…”

He activated his sword and sliced though the fabric in one swing, shutting it off and sifting through the smoking ruins of the coat. “…is that there is always more than expected.”

He pulled out a glowing gem from the lining of Rick’s lab coat, holding it up to the light. It glinted in the sun’s rays, a beautiful, shining purple color.

Zim stared. “What is that?” 

Ceren placed the gem in a pouch on his belt, next to his sword. “It is a Kyber crystal,” he explained, “and a very rare one, no less. They must have been transported to my world somehow, perhaps using this,” he held up the portal gun. “Which means there is a way back to my Master.”

He looked the gun over again, turning it on its side. He noticed a small switch and flicked it up with his thumb, then fired the gun at the ground. “This portal could help us find the boy. Perhaps it will also take us to his place of conception.”

“What will we do when we find him?” Zim asked.

“No survivors,” Ceren said, stashing the portal gun away in his robes again. “He will be dealt with, of that I will be certain. Come.”

He jumped into the portal and disappeared.

Zim sighed and followed suit, emerging in a different part of the galaxy. When he looked around, he noticed that the lodgings were definitely different than on Urth, and it was getting dark here as the sun set.

“Yes,” his counterpart said, “This is it. I can feel his presence,” He got out his laser sword, but did not activate it. “He is close.”

They walked together in the street, Ceren raising the hood on his black cloak to better hide his features. They passed houses that appeared to be empty, though some had cars in the driveways. The two of them were alone in the street.

He stopped at a house near the end of the street, one with an open garage and what looked to be a small laboratory inside of it. “He is here.”

“Certain?” Zim asked nervously. He really didn’t want to kill any more people today.

“Yes,” The other Irken said, “his energy is strong. I feel his fear.”

He walked into the garage and inspected the work table, picking up the various beakers sitting on the workbench. “Brilliant,” he mused quietly, “We could use these experiments to create untold horrors, and perhaps take this world as our own to rule.”

The Sith turned away from the table and looked over the papers and notes hanging on the walls of the garage. He reached up and pulled one paper off the wall, reading it over silently. His breathing tubes hissed, the only thing breaking the tense silence.  
After a minute of skimming though what was written on the paper, Ceren folded it up and put it in his robes. He approached the side door leading into the house and stood there for a moment, stretching out his hand.

“What is it?” Zim asked, wondering what he was doing.

“There are more bodies within. They are animate, and healthy. Three living humans, speaking of… someone called Jerry.” He lowered his hand and turned to Zim. “They are unaware of our presence. The boy is not among them.”

“Well, then lets look elsewhere!” Zim said, walking out of the garage. “He might not be on this planet at all.”

“Wait,” Ceren said, using the Force to freeze Zim in his tracks, “they are speaking of… their offspring. A boy called…Morty.”

He activated his laser sword, the bright red glow lighting up the small garage. “Yes, these humans know of the boy. They must be interrogated for his current location.”

Zim watched with unease as his duplicate thrust out his hand, the door flying off its hinges and into the house. 

The little Sith stepped inside, sword ignited and making the air stink, the smell reminding Zim of melting metal.

Three humans stood in the living room, staring at Ceren, mouths open in shock. 

“The boy,” Ceren hissed, pointing his blade at his new captives, “Where is he?”

One of them, a woman, recovered from her shock long enough to let out a small laugh. “Aww, aren’t you cute!” She raised her phone and snapped a picture of him. “Summer, isn’t he cute?”

“Beth, I don’t think he likes you laughing at him,” the human male in the group said nervously.

The one called Beth laughed. “Don’t be ridiculous, Jerry, I’m sure he doesn’t mind. He’s adorable! Look how tiny he is!” She looked at her photo. “This is totally going on my Instagram!”

“Where is the one called Morty?” Ceren hissed angrily, rage boiling within him. “He must be eliminated!”

“Oh, he’s probably with Rick on another adventure,” Beth said dismissively, “He should be back soon, its almost dinner time, and I’ve made his favorite.”

Ceren growled, obviously frustrated. He raised his hand, and Jerry started choking, being lifted off of his feet. “I do not have the patience for your games,” he said as Beth and Summer yelled out in shock. “Tell me his precise location, or this human will die!”

“Okay, okay,” Summer yelled, “I don’t know where he is, but I can call Grandpa Rick and ask him where they are!”

“He is dead,” Ceren said sharply. “I killed him. The boy escaped, and he-“

“What’s going on, sweetie?” A voice said from the kitchen. A FAMILIAR voice. Ceren stared in shock as Rick entered the living room. He saw the Irken and narrowed his eyes. “Oh, its you.”

“No,” the Irken said in disbelief, momentarily releasing Jerry. “How are you living?”

Rick sighed. “Ever heard of cloning? You dispatched a fake, you idiot! I was monitoring the whole thing through the cameras in its eyes.” He slow clapped. “Props to you, though, that was quite the show! Very entertaining battle! Oh, and the gem you took was also fake, by the way, sooo… good going there.”

Ceren snarled and raised both arms, and both Summer and Beth started choking. He looked to Zim. “Kill the one called Jerry!”

Zim brought out his gun as Jerry gasped and started running through the house screaming. The Irken gave chase, firing his weapon at the fleeing human. 

The masked doppelgänger returned his attention to Rick. “I will slaughter your family if you do not give me what I seek.”

“Really?” Rick smirked. “And what would that be again?”

“The gem! My Master requires it for study!” Ceren tightened his Force grip on Summer and Beth as he spoke. “To build a holocron and activate the Sith Temple.”

“Ohhh, that sounds neat,” Rick said, his voice dripping with sarcasm, “Too bad I’ve already used it! Sucks for you!”

“Then your family will die!”

Rick shrugged. “Go ahead, there’s infinite realities, I’ll just go to another one!”

Ceren looked from Rick to his choking captives, and back again. He released them, and Beth and Summer fell to the floor, coughing and gagging as they sucked down fresh air.

“Dad, what the hell?” Beth yelled, her voice horse and scratchy. “You were going to let us die?”

“Yeah, Grandpa Rick, what the hell?!” Summer chimed in, echoing her mother. “You are such an asshole!”

“Relax, I got this,” Rick said casually, “I used the crystal to make another one of the laser swords.” He pulled a small device out of his lab coat, which the Sith instantly knew was a lightsaber hilt. “If he wants a fight, he’ll get one!”

Growling, Ceren flung Beth and Summer away with the Force, and took up a fighting stance. “You will not survive. I have been trained by Lord Maul himself.”

Rick shrugged and activated his own weapon, the yellow blade mixing with the red light of his opponents saber. “I have no idea who that is, but going off of past experience, I’m sure I’ll meet him very soon, anyway.”

He lunged, and their sabers clashed together as the fight began.

**Author's Note:**

> “Na-hah ur su ka-haat. Su ka haru aat.”
> 
> (Translation: Lead the Sith to us, if there are any here.”)


End file.
